To Facebook or Not To Facebook?

So my dear Molly has joined Facebook.  I don't know much about it.  I used to think all technology was evil, but if Molly would do it, it can't be all bad.  (Although she DID have that run-in with the music of the Grateful Dead -- seriously, I guarantee THOSE people won't be grateful when they're dead!)  So anyway, I'm wondering if I should join Facebook too.  What do you all think?

Lucky indeed

I was listening to the radio the other day (I know, I know), and I heard a song come on that I thought was absolutely wonderful.  It's a beautiful song about being in love with your best friend (a feeling that I know too well), and it goes like this:

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Lucky we're in love every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

It was like it was Molly and me singing to each other, but really it was Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat.  I fell in love with the song, and I couldn't wait to get home to look up more about this wonderful couple that seemed to have so much in common with my lady love and me.  (I'll admit, I even planned on trying to get a double date set up with them, because I was sure that they would want to meet us too.)

Well ... did you know that Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat aren't even dating each other?!?  In fact, Colbie is engaged to someone else, and from what I can tell, Jason is gay or something.  So why in the world are they singing a love song to each other?  And putting it on the radio?  What if your boyfriends find out?

I just don't know what this world is coming to.  I don't watch pornography -- hard OR soft (I'm looking at you, Julia Roberts) -- because I don't want to see people engaging in adultery.  So why would I want to listen to Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat engage in adultery on the radio?  It's just ridiculous, and it reminds me how far the standards of the world have sunk.

What kind of names are Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat, anyway?  That's why you should never play Scrabble while drunk.

Big News!

I know several of you are anxious to hear about my meeting with the bishop, so even though I have much bigger fish to fry, I thought I would take a minute to give you all an update.

I went and met with the bishop, and it didn't go exactly as I had planned, but in retrospect, I think it was better. After we got done with the small talk, he began talking to me about the inspiration he receives as bishop, especially when he is making callings. He also told me that I am entitled to receive the same type of inspiration for issues in my own life, which I already knew, of course, but it was good that he got me thinking about it. He talked for several more minutes about inspiration, but I had a hard time paying close attention, because he had gotten the wheels in my mind turning, and I was thinking about some of the inspiration I had been receiving lately and ignoring.

We eventually got down to the reason he had called me in: to give me a new calling. Of course, I expected him to call me as the Elders Quorum President, as I mentioned the other day. Well, he didn't (yet). He called me as the Elders Quorum Secretary. He told me he felt that it was important for me to be involved in the Elders Quorum so that I could "see firsthand the inspiration that takes place among the presidency." Of course, he couldn't actually say a couple things he was thinking, but I am smart enough to figure them out: one, he feels that my influence in presidency meetings will be good to make sure that the EQP stays in line with the gospel; and two, once the timing is right, I will be called as EQP.

When I was on my mission, the mission president called me to serve as mission secretary, and I spent nearly eight months in the mission home in that capacity before being called as an Assistant to the President. From that experience, I understand completely that priesthood leaders sometimes like to ease people into callings to avoid hurting the feelings of the outgoing people, and I completely respect that. The bishop didn't say anything about meeting with me periodically so I can let him know how things are going, but I assume he will just let me know when he needs to talk, and I will make myself available.

But remember what I said earlier, how I had a hard time listening to the things the bishop was saying because I was thinking about inspiration I had been receiving? Well, when I left the bishop's office with my new calling, I went straight to Molly's house. I picked her up and we went for a drive to a park in Provo that I really like, where I used to play Ultimate Frisbee before the city built some dumb monument in the middle of our field. As we walked around the park, I turned to Molly, got down on one knee, and asked her to marry me. I apologized that I didn't have a ring yet, and I explained to her that the bishop had essentially told me the time was right for us to get engaged.

Obviously, this took Molly off guard. But even more obviously, she said yes. And then, as I looked into the eyes of the future Molly Parley, we shared our first kiss. And our second kiss. And a couple others after that.

Another late night

I don't know why, but lately, I can't bring myself to go to bed before 2:00 or 3:00 in the morning. It seems weird, because I spent so long going to bed at 10:30, but I have to say that there are a lot of really good things about being up late. Most of the channels on the TV don't have much good on, but every once in a while I can find something good. On Thursday nights (or, I should say, Friday mornings), some channel shows four or five straight episodes of "Who's the Boss?" which used to be my favorite show. I love watching the innocence, back before Alyssa Milano turned into a woman of questionable morals and was just a cute little girl.

Anyway, since I am up and have an hour or two before my show starts, I thought I would fill you in on what I am up to. I got a call from the executive secretary in the ward today asking me to come meet with the bishop this Sunday morning. I know I am not supposed to tell people about my callings until I have been sustained, but I guess since it isn't official yet, I can say how excited I am that he will be calling me as the new Elders Quorum President. Like I said in my previous post, the current EQP is a nice enough guy, but obviously out of touch. I am a little susprised that they have released him so quickly, as I just emailed the bishop about it yesterday, but I respect and admire the bishop's prompt action.

Molly is feeling much better now, although that issue with Samuel had her pretty freaked out. I don't understand how a guy like him could think he deserves a girl like Molly more than I do, but I guess he has some mental issues that he needs to get taken care of, so I will try to be charitable. Samuel's objections to Molly and me kissing did make me think a lot about whether it is right, and I am more convinced than ever that the time is right. In fact, I am thinking about stepping things up a little bit; we had planned on a quick peck on the lips, but I am thinking about suggesting to her that we let it linger for three or four seconds. Molly has never kissed anyone before, so I don't want to scare her off, but I think a four-second kiss might be exactly what our relationship needs right now.

I still haven't heard from Governor Huntsman, which really upsets me. Even worse, when I went to check my email this evening to see if he had written, I had an email from someone names Richard K. Lee with the subject line, "Viagra - No prescription needed." I wouldn't be surprised if this is some stunt by Samuel to protest my decision to kiss Molly, but if so, let me just say: I don't need Viagra, because Molly and I are chaste and virtuous.

That's about it for now. I will try to do a better job posting in the future, and I will be sure to let you all know once the bishop makes my new calling official.

--President Peter Parley of the Elders Quorum

One disaster after another

I am sure you all remember the last time I wrote about a date I had with Molly, which led to me writing to Governor Huntsman about the smut here in Utah. Well, Mr. Huntsman has not written me back, which makes me think he doesn't care much about our state. And he isn't the only one. My Elders Quorum President pulled me aside a couple weeks ago and told me he is concerned that I am too riled up about this pornography issue. He said something about needing balance and tolerance and some other crap, and I was shocked and appalled that his priorities are so out of whack. I am hoping the bishop will launch an investigation into the EQP's life soon to figure out where these apostate views are coming from. Maybe then they will call me as the EQP like they should have originally. I mean, I had been home from my mission for three weeks when this guy was called, and he has been home from his mission for nearly seven years! How in the world did they think he could still be in touch with the Spirit when he has been home that long. I told them so then, but I will do my best not to rub it in when they have to release him because he advocates smut.

So anyway, back to my point. Molly and I went out again on Monday. I hadn't wanted to make it a big public thing, because I get kind of tired of our laundry being aired on the Internet, but Molly mentioned it, so I guess the cat got out of the bag. Anyway, we planned to go to the temple to do some baptisms, but the temple was closed for Family Home Evening. I should have taken that as a sign that the evening was ruined, but I didn't. So we went to dinner, and everything tasted good, but there must have been something wrong with it. Why? Because about 20 minutes after we left the restaurant, we were walking around Temple Square, and we stopped and looked into each other's eyes. We knew the time had come for our first kiss. As I leaned in to kiss her, she got a look in her eyes that I have never seen before. I couldn't figure out if it was excitement or nerves. Turns out, it was food poisoning. Just as my lips were about to touch hers, she put her head down. Before I could feel rejected, she threw up on my shoe.

The rest of the evening was spent cleaning off my shoe and holding a damp cloth to Molly's head. We had to reschedule the first kiss, and the entire night was a disaster.

My Letter to Governor Hunstman

I recently sent an email to Governor Huntsman regarding our experience with the movie last week. Here is the email I sent:

Dear Governor Huntsman,

Last week, I went over to a female friend's house with my sister to watch a movie. My friend had rented the movie from the local Blockbuster Video. It was marked as Not Rated, which my friend took to mean that there was nothing objectionable in it. Not very long into the movie, suddenly everyone on the screen was naked. We stopped the tape immediately, but that couldn't undo the damage that had been done, as my innocent friend and my dear 15-year-old sister had already been contaminated.

What makes me so angry is that, because this movie is unrated, anyone -- of any age -- could have rented it. Anyone could have mistakenly believed, as my friend did, that a movie about Victorian England with no rating would certainly be innocent. But anyone who made that mistake would pay dearly, just as we have.

I believe that we here in Utah should stand for something higher. This smut has no place in our communities, and the only way we will be in a position to lift the rest of the country is if we get to high ground immediately. Please let me know as soon as possible what you and I can do to alleviate this scourge on our state. Thank you.

Sincerely,
Peter Parley
peter_parley@hotmail.com

I will let you all know what he has to say. I am excited to work with him in solving this problem.

My bathroom has that view, too

Well, Martha and I went over to Molly's house on Friday, and anyone who reads Molly's blog knows what a disaster it was. I am not as concerned about myself as I am about Martha and Molly. It is so flipping frustrating for me that good girls like them can work so hard to keep themselves pure, and then out of the blue, with no warning, they are tainted. I feel so terrible that I was the one who put Martha in that situation. I hope she can forgive me, but I guess first, I need to forgive myself.

I am mad as heck that movies like that are put on the same rental racks as the good and decent movies. I am not sure what I am going to do about it, but I guarantee that I will do something. That kind of movie has no place in society, especially here in Utah, where we are supposed to be above that worldly garbage. I know I can't change the world all at once, so I will start small -- maybe with Governor Huntsman or President Hinckley or something. All I know is that If we can get Utah cleaned up, we will then be in a position to lift the rest of the country up.

Do any of you know of any good resources to help me? I am not going to give up until unsuspecting, pure girls like Molly and Martha are safe from the evils of these movies.